Neutral Site World Series???

With the World Series coming to an end on the Phillies improbable season the biggest question other than how much damage can dumb ass Philly fans cause is should the world series be held in a neutral climate controlled site? You go 100 or so years without a rain shortened game or stoppage of play and all of a sudden this is the hot topic. The amazing thing is that a lot of the writers appear to be on board with this idea. I heard Buster Onley on Mike & Mike this morning going on about the revenue that could be brought in by having the World Series in one stadium for 7 consecutive days. He went on to describe how all the awards like Cy Young and Gold Gloves could be announced and Hall of Famers could converge and we could just have a week long baseball orgy in this neutral site. Sounds good right???

WRONG, it's bad enough that football has pansied out and only plays the Super Bowl in climate controlled environments. Pretty much the only people that get to go to this game are rich people and celebrities or chumps willing to come off nearly a grand for a seat in the nose bleed section. Baseball is to me still a pure sport where the fans make up a lot of the identity for the team. Not to diminish what fans do in other sports but it just seems wrong for the World Series to be played on a neutral turf. Can you imagine the Red Sox and Cubs playing a World Series in Anaheim or The Orioles and Cardinals playing in Houston? Just the thought of it makes my skin crawl. I'm tired of marketing and money dictating how we as fans get to enjoy our sports. It's bad enough that the games don't start until 8:30 and are played on work/school nights. I know that Bud Selig vehemently opposes this idea and for probably the first time I support him. I just hope that when he steps down that MLB doesn't get a commissioner like the NFL just did that is more interested in playing games in Europe and expanding the league than fixing other issues like the shitty pre-season. It's ideas like this that turn people away from sports but unfortunately tend to make millions for people who already have millions.

Philly Phans Know How to Celebrate

This is all over the sports blog world, but since Inky, XL and I had so much to say about game 5 yesterday, I couldn't help posting it on our little corner of the blogosphere. This is one of those pure moments where visuals meet audio to make for a full and complete experience. Just seeing this fuckwit get hit in the head with a Grey Goose bottle would be ok, but hearing it makes for a once in a life time experience. I've watched this video about 20 times already, and it never gets old.

I Have Exorcised the Demons, Part 2

Well, despite my esteemed colleague's Lead Pipe Lock prediction earlier in the evening, the Phillies have won the World Series. That's right, Philadelphia. The curse has been lifted; it can be done. Now we have no more excuses for not winning championships. We can do it, we can all do it.

So, sorry XL and Greazy who are Philly haters from way back. Not that I am really a fan of the Phillies, but my hometown deserves this. Just as much or as little as any other team deserves to win.

And, a little note to baseball fans complaining about how nobody was watching this series. It is your fault. How could you not watch this? A worst to first team and a team full of MVPs. Is it really just because they are not wearing pinstripes? Then shame on you. You are not a true fan if you only want to see the highest payrolls buy their way into championships. That is not baseball, and that is not what sports is supposed to be about. So, fuck off. Don't make me get out my batteries and hurl them at you. BOOOOO BOOOOO!!!

Take that bitches.

Stud of the Week: Barack Obama

For anyone who actually pays attention, you know that Barack Obama gave a huge assist to sports fans tonight. Despite repeated, and false, assertions by John McCain that Obama was pushing back the start time of tonight's baseball game, nothing could be further from the truth. All Obama did, was make sure that anyone tuning into the game tonight gets to see baseball pretty much right off the top. They don't have to sit through all the B.S. Fox pregame, and in the end, isn't that a good thing? See, he's helping average Americans already.

The Phils Will Win....But Not Tonight

This will be short and to the point because I want to get it posted before the game ends tonight. It is currently 3-3 heading to the bottom of the 7th inning. It is my belief that Philadelphia will lose this game and Brad Lidge will be the responsible party. Greazy and I have talked about this already and I just can't believe that Lidge will hold up to the pressure. You know he still has nightmares of St. Louis and he has been perfect thus far. So unless Tampa's bull pen turns into the Orioles bull pen (which it could if Chad Bradford is brought in) this is my prediction for the evening. As much as it pains me to think that the city of Philadelphia will win a championship I have resigned myself to the likelihood of it happening.

I'll Say it: Greg Oden Has Huge Tits*

* By which I mean he is a huge bust
Just 3 minutes into his NBA career (a career which is already off to a 1 year delay) Portland center Greg Oden sprained his foot last night. Anyone who saw Oden play at Ohio State knows that is an amazing physical presence, and yet, he seems to lack the ability to stay physically healthy.

Maybe we should consider that he is not 21 years old as he says he is, but 44 years old as his looks say he is. Have you ever seen him with glasses on? He looks older than Morgan Freeman, and that motherfucker is old as shit. I think we need to cut Oden open and count his rings. God knows Portland won't be in danger of winning any rings if he keeps getting hurt every third day. I think it's safe to say, that with 1% of the precincts reporting: Greg Oden is a huge bust.

I Have Exorcised the Demons!

Ha ha, St. Louis. I told you not to do it, but you didn't listen. And, now you're the ones with the bad luck. Sarah Palin has now infected your club. Not only did you get shut out by the Kings, Manny Legace tripped over that carpet they set out for her to walk on. If she is such a damn good hockey mom, then how come she can't walk on the ice?

How do I know that the curse is broken? The same day Sarah Palin dropped the puck in St. Louis, the Flyers won their game against the Devil 6-3. It still may be too early to tell if the curse is totally gone, but I am cautiously optimistic.

Take that St. Louis. Truth be told, I really don't have anything against you, so hopefully your curse will be short lived.

Just for the record, however. . . .told you so.

Breaking The Spell

Sarah Palin is planning to infect another franchise with her bad mojo soon. St. Louis is apparently letting her drop the puck before their game. DON'T DO IT!!! I'm serious, don't do it.

The Flyers are 0-3-3. They have yet to win a game; the last team in the league without a win. They scored 6 goals the other night and still couldn't get it to work. It is all her fault. Don't believe the hype about the coach or the lack of serious goal tending. It is her fault.

So, take my advice, Blues. Turn her away. It is your only hope.

This election has to come quickly, or the Flyers may never win.

Quote Of The Day

I was reading the sports page of the Baltimore Sun this evening when I came across this outstanding quote from Ravens Defensive End Terrell Suggs. This quote was in reference to the Ravens D possibly having a bounty on Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward. Suggs is quoted as saying "If there is a guy loose pulling people's drawers down in the neighborhood, you're going to be alert for him."

You've got to love the originality of a quote like that, only a guy that looks like Bubba Gump could come up with something that inspiring. Suggs also says in this same interview that Troy Smith should start over Joe Flacco and then says he has been misquoted and that he really thinks the Ravens should run multiple packages to get both guys in. I for one would like for T-Sizzle to stick to hitting the QB (preferably while he still has the ball) and stop talking to the media as he obviously is an idiot.

Look Who's Back!!!

And you thought there wouldn't be a sports connection to this. Well it looks like Terry Tate is back, and he's got a whole web site full of content.

"You just subscribed to Terry's Journal of Pain. And the first issue's free baby! Woo!" Love it.

Weekend Wrap Up

Ah, another week, another sports bonanza. Things are finally decided in baseball, and I for one couldn't be happier. And, another crazy week of football has left us all with fantasy regrets. Let's break it down, shall we?

Those Red Sox. They had to make it interesting. And, they tried. But, ultimately failed. It feels good to type that. After all, it seems so long ago that these lovable losers were finally breaking the "curse" in 2004. Now, Boston has had a veritable orgy of titles and has become that dreaded thing. A front runner. And, kind of an obnoxious one to boot. We're talking New York territory. So, hey, Champ. . .how about you sit out the next couple plays? Let one of these two new teams have a crack at it. 28 years is a long time to wait, Philly. Don't fuck this up.

Who would have thought that the Colts, Chargers, Cowboys and Patriots would be here? Woefully under performing, riddled with injuries, and looking rather ordinary. I'm sure there are people all over this country cursing those pre-season bets now. While the Colts and Chargers could rally, I'm pretty sure it's over in Big D. And, it gives this writer so much joy to say that. Serves them right. And, once again they are a 1 Roy Williams town.

When football is bad, it is real bad. Greazy and I watched the end of the Raiders/Jets game. If you want to call what those teams were doing "playing." It was more like fucking around. It was painful watching two NFL teams unable to get into reasonable field goal range during OT. I mean, come on. Most teams take less than 5 minutes to do that. It is sad to see how many teams just flat out can't compete anymore. Cincinnati is a joke. The Lions are pitiful and the Chiefs and Raiders are just plain shitty.

Go Bills! And, Tennessee. And, the Redskins. How about all those unlikely heroes. It is nice to see some different teams compete, at least for now. Also, as much as it pains me to say, I think the Steelers are the most underrated 5-1 team right now.

The Flyers are 0-5 with two points from two overtime losses. When are they going to listen to me? They are cursed. No, all you read is about firing the coach. That won't solve anything. Sarah Palin is to blame. I swear it. Now we can be like all those Cubs fans who can blame all their failures on outside sources. Nice to have a fall back plan.

How much do I love watching Keith Olbermann and Dan Patrick do the NFL highlights on NBC. Just like old times.

Stiff of the Week: Trevor Wikre

I don't think this is the type of message we want to be sending to the kids of our nation. I'm sure you've heard the story of Trevor Wikre, a lineman at DII Mesa State, who decided to have the pinkie finger on his right hand cut off, rather than miss the rest of his Senior season at the school that A) apparently exists, and B) also has a football team.

I'm all for Trevor chasing his dreams, but unless he's Randy Moss, Steve McNair or Jerry Rice I don't think he had much of a chance of playing professional ball in the NFL. So, after he's done playing those last few games of his college career, he'll be left with a 9 fingered existence, but sadly, he'll never again be able to do a good Dr. Evil impression. Tragic.

There's no doubting that this guy is a total douche, worthy of Stiff of the Week honors, but I'd also like to include his coach, parents and doctors in this award. Good job helping this kid work through his feelings of loss for his career by pointing out that there's more to life than DII pigskin. Top notch!

p.s. I think this kid also dramatically underestimated the importance of the pinkie in the administration of a shocker. Good luck getting one in the stink now Trevor... you dumb fuckwit.

I Need An Old Priest and A Young Priest

I don't want to say "I told you so" to the Flyers, but sometimes you just have to call a spade a spade. You let that woman into our building. You let her drop the puck for our home opener. You let her wave and smile and do that stupid shit she does all over our ice. Now, we are cursed. I hope you are happy.

Sarah Palin has put a curse on the Flyers and now we have to get rid of it. Three straight losses are enough for me to know that something is wrong. They have the exact same team as last year. As a matter of fact, they should be better because Simon Gagne is back in the lineup. But, are we better? Are we winning? Are we looking like a playoff team? The answer to all these questions is no. The difference. That woman put a hex on the whole damn thing.

So this is what we are going to need. A pit bull, some lipstick, the bones of a whole chicken and water blessed by a democrat. Then, someone needs to lock that woman in a room and smack her every hour on the hour until she promises to go back where the hell she came from.

Then, we'll burn some sage in the Wachovia Center, drink some beers and punch the guy next to us in the face. Then and only then will the curse be broken.

Damn you, John McCain. Damn you for doing this to us. A curse on both your houses. Wait, a curse on all 13 of your houses.

Oops, They Did it Again

Today is always one of my favorite days in sports. No, not Tuesday. But, the day after something happens that makes every sportswriter have to tear up a month's worth of columns. Let me explain. I'm sure you've seen this in the past few weeks.

Eli Manning is better than Peyton now. The Giants are quite literally the best team in the NFL, not just the NFC. Jon Lester is unbeatable at home. Josh Beckett has been the Sox best pitcher in the post season. The Dodgers have Manny mojo, and that is all they need.

Wait, what? You see all that stuff that people have been spewing is now considered null and void. Why you ask? Well, Beckett and Lester allowed 8 and 9 runs respectively against the Rays. Manny Ramirez may know how to fight and talk shit but so far that hasn't helped the Dodgers out of their 3-1 hole. And, poor Eli. I think he has suffered the most. He went from the next big thing to the dog house. Letting those Cleveland Browns run all over him and throwing 3 interceptions doesn't jive with the mantle they've handed him. Those poor sportswriters, they trusted him and Eli made a fool of them. So did John Lester. How dare they?

I just wish, again, that someone would let me get paid big bucks to be so wrong so often. These people, I mean, I know they're just doing what they are supposed to do. But, it all comes down to perspective. Eli is good, but better than Peyton? Too soon to tell, but that isn't a sexy headline. BoSox unstoppable, repeat inevitable (one more time)? Sounds better than Big Papi 0 for 34 in the series.

But, hey. Why bother with perspective when it is more fun to guess? Maybe every sports writer should spend some time in Philly. It will knock all the optimism and hyperbole right out of them. Then, maybe they could be a little less excited next time the Cowboys sign a felon and Kyle Orton has a few good weeks. But, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong. Check back next week.

Weekend Wrap Up

As Greazy is off asking himself "Is this good for the company?" and XL is no doubt still crying in his lower calorie premium light beer, it is up to me to recap the weekend of sports that was. Men; what are you going to do?

Let's see. . .where to begin. The Rays made it a series, winning in the 11th inning against the New York, I'm sorry, The Boston Red Sox. Isn't funny how those two teams seems so similar now? Seriously, you'd think they didn't remember all those years of being whiny little bitches. And, the Phillies did what everyone thought they would do; lose behind Jamie Moyer. So, now the Dodgers think they can win. Good for them.

Now, football. As I mentioned before XL is crying because his Ravens got their butt holes pushed in by the Colts. Apparently, someone finally held up a mirror in front of Peyton Manning, so he could remember who the fuck he was. That bomb to Marvin was gorgeous. Sorry XL.

The Redskins got a little too penis-y and looked past the Rams, who won on a last minute field goal. But, before the Rams break their arms patting themselves on the back, they still suck.

Around the rest of the league: Tony Romo broke his little finger and will be out 4 weeks. Also, he was the beneficiary of the league's bullshit tuck rule. Somewhere, Al Davis is probably still dead. Did I also mention the blocked punt that resulted in the Cardinals winning OT touchdown? No? Well, it was great. Brett Favre is still magical, but Matt Cassel is not. Who knew?

Under the heading "Who the Fuck Cares": Texans beat Miami, Vikings beat Detroit, Packers beat Seattle. Oh, and Philly beat San Fran. Yawn.

Finally, Sarah Fucking Palin. She did get booed, a bit. But, come on, Philly. She kissed Scott Gomez and said she was going to root for New York because that bitch is from Anchorage. Enough Said.

So there you have it. All the news that is fit to print. Cheer up XL and Greazy. Remember one thing. The season is long, and your teams suck. Wait, that won't cheer you up. Never mind. I'll think of something else and get back to ya!!

Stiff of the Week: Ed Snider

Ed Snider, chairman of the Philadelphia Flyers has always irritated the hell out of me. An uber-republican, he has contributed to John McCain, let the Republican National Convention camp out in the Wachovia Center (need to change that name again, huh Ed?) and now has perpetrated the biggest crime of all. Embracing Sarah Palin. That's right. That lipstick wearing pit bull will be dropping the puck at the Flyers home opener on Saturday. In addition, she will be joined by the "Ultimate Hockey Mom" contest winner on the ice. Everyone who enters the contest gets a free----wait for it----lipstick. I'm all for holding onto your analogies, but this is ridiculous. The name of the color you ask? "Puck-er Peach."

You know Flyers, we were just starting to work out our problems. My loyalty to you has been tested more times than I care to remember, and we even had that year off from each other to clear our heads. But, I thought we were on the same page. Now you go and do something like this. I just don't know how you expect me to take you seriously anymore.

By the way, if you want to read about some real hockey moms; you know, the one's who have sons who actually play hockey, read this. And, this.

Flyers, it's not a good start, but keep going.

Hallelujah! Holy Shit! Where's the Tylenol?

Donovan McNabb couldn't stop 'em. Brian Westbrook couldn't stop 'em. The Philly run defence couldn't stop 'em and even a few terrible calls on an Eagles punt return and a called back Randel El TD.

The Washington Redskins, my Washington Redskins, are 4-1 and 2-1 in the SEC of the NFL after playing all three division games on the road. The offence seemed as if it could run at will, and Jason Campbell brushed off an 0 for 5 start to lead his team in a confidant and capable fashion. The defence, minus three of it's best players in Jason Taylor, Marcus Washington and Shawn Springs, absolutely had their way with a much ballyhooed offensive unit.

I'm well aware how fortunes can change in this league, especially when you have New York, Philly and Dallas all left on the schedule, but I will say that I'm having a good time watching this team, and their GoBot coach.

Separated at Birth #10

After XL and I personally scouted the match up, I spent some time this evening watching the Tampa Bay Rays take the second game of the ALDS over the Chi Sox. What I really noticed in this game, however is how much Rays starter Scott Kazmir looks like Brit funnyman Simon Pegg. And for the better part of the first inning, Kazmir was pitching like a British comedy actor rather than an All Star. He got things right and made it into the 6th, before yielding to the big Aussie: Grant Balfour.