Thursday, September 11, 2008

If You Can Catch A Football You Can Write A Book

That title is a far cry from one of my favorite lines from Dodgeball "if you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball" good times. As I was browsing in my local Barnes and Noble's tonight I saw a New Arrival that caught my eye. The book is "More Than Just A Catch" by David Tyree with a foreword by Eli Manning. You've got to be fucking shitting me, all you have to do now days is catch a football in a Superbowl and you can get a book deal. Better yet the guy that threw it to you gets to write the foreword??? Nothing against Eli but I don't know what his qualifications are in the area of writing. He can throw the rock and stand in the pocket under pressure but can he keep people interested in reading a book? Plus what did he say? Something along the lines of "As I let the ball go I knew it was a shitty pass but then again Tyree was playing for his supper so I knew he'd find a way to come down with it" that would be literary genius.

I know I'm no William Shakespeare or Mark Twain but I'd love to think I could write a book more interesting than one by a guy who has only showed up for one game in his life. I mean up to this point all Tyree was known for was "sleeping with Katie to man....she's got big big titties" on the Surreal World hosted by Dave Chapelle. I think this marks at least the third book by a Giants player since winning the Super Bowl. It was a big win but lets not get carried away here. It's not like they solved world hunger or global warming by winning this thing so why are people buying these books? I guess this is one mystery I will not be able to solve but this is stiff of the week territory as far as I'm concerned. Being as I can't decide what is worse, writing a book about a catch or letting the guy who threw it write the foreword I will name both Tyree and Eli Manning as my stiffs of the week.

2 comments:

Angry Inky said...

This is why I can't get a book deal. I can't catch.

XL said...

You also throw like a girl...but that probably doesn't have anything to do with it other than you couldn't write any forewords either.