The Nats Have Peaked

Every team should win the first game in their new stadium, that's just the rule, but you don't want to blow your wad. The Washington Nationals opened the as yet to be renamed for a ton of dough - Nationals Stadium last night in storybook fashion. After getting the first hit, scoring the first run, and reveling in the fact that they weren't playing at RFK any longer, they got a big hit from their star to win the game.

With the score knotted at 2's in the bottom of the 9th, Ryan Zimmerman (a Virginia Native) stood with a 2-2 count and two outs. He knocked the next pitch out of the yard to give the Nationals a 1-0 record at their new home ground. The only thing that could have made this experience better, was if the cheers he heard upon winning the game, came from all 41,888 seats. Instead, there were only 39,389 people on hand for opening day. That means. 2,500 tickets went unsold which is a fucking travesty. I know it was cold and all, but this was the first game in a new park. Had I known that it wasn't sold out, I would have gone, but I guess I'll have to wait till April 11th for the game with XL.

It's Opening Day!!! Woo Hoo??

Today is a day I used to look forward to since I was probably 5 years old. All the Spring training is done and the boys are back in town for another season of Orioles baseball. 10 years ago Greazy and I were down town with all the other thousands of O's fans looking for a repeat of the Wire to Wire performance from the 97 season. If you told me then that now, 10 years later, we'd be looking at a likely 11th losing season in a row I'd have told you that you were crazy. How could a team that went Wire to Wire in97 not be able to play .500 ball the next year or any year after that for what is likely 11 years?

The answer is simple, poor ownership and no front office. It's been a Merry Go Round of GM's and consultants from Syd "Don't call me Fog Horn Leghorn" Thrift (God rest his soul) to Frank Wren, to Mike Flanagan and some other guy. Now we have Andy McPhail who is being heralded as the Savior of the organization. He is expected to follow in his father's foot steps and bring the Orioles back to their former glory. So as we did in 1988 we've traded away almost every key player/pitcher we have and are essentially starting over. By 2010 the O's are expected to be a legitimate contender with their young players in the minors and these guys we've traded for this off season. Only time will tell but if history is any indicator as long as the O's stay the rebuilding course they should actually be competitive. In 1990, two years after the worst start in MLB history the O's were very close to winning the division. Had their been a Wild Card at that time they would've probably made it.

So as I sit here today reading the Baltimore Sun I guess I have to hang my hopes on the future. What is amusing is the Sun is not featuring much on the team or game but there is a two page story about the "Crab Shuffle" a video board feature that happens during the 5th inning of every game. Don't get me wrong, of all the stupid between inning things that go on (7th inning stretch excluded) I love me some Crab Shuffle. I'm never wrong because I can keep my eye on the ball, however I don' t know that this piece of the ball game deserves a two page article in the Sun. So happy Opening Day all around, I'm sure the Red Sox and Yankee fans are excited. I personally can't wait to go see Chi-Town in August and the Nat's stadium in April.

On a side bar I'm going to have to make our lovely president George W. Bush my stiff of the week for having the worst home run call I've ever heard on ESPN last night with the legendary Jon Miller.

Cats Thrash the Dons

Inky and I stayed up late last night to watch some Sunday Afternoon Footy, live from Telstra Dome in Melbourne. It's getting harder and harder to sound honest when I say we chose the Geelong Cats as the team we would follow back in '05 after passing through on a trip down the Great Ocean Road. It just seems like band wagon jumping since the Cats blazed their way to a title last year, and have started this season looking like perfection it self.

Last night Geelong took on a team in Essendon that many consider a serious contender for the Cat's crown, and turned them away like a second rate VFL side. Geelong was amazing in a 22.18 (150) to 6.15 (51) trashing of Essendon, and everyone got in on the action. Geelong had 14 (out of 22) players kick a goal, and no one had more than three. Last year's Brownlow Meddal winner (read: MVP) Jimmy Bartel was amazing with nearly 40 possessions, two goals and the amazing flying mark you see pictured above. Gary Ablett had another amazing game, as did so many others, but the hallmark of this Geelong side is that they all elevate together and make one another better.

Despite the fact that the final score showed a 99 point drubbing, it was still a very exciting game to watch. The type of game that The Age points out that the team getting whipped can enjoy the brilliance of saying this was the kind of "Football that opponents cannot help but admire even as they are humiliated." Channel 7 Commentators Bruce McAvaney and Dennis Cometti put it right when they said that unlike most blow outs, watching the Cats dominate is exhilarating and impossible to turn away from.

Those same two men add to the enjoyment, by the way, keeping you locked into the action with their enthusiasm for the game. Weather it's Cometti's self admitted man crush on Bartel, McAvaney's liberal use of the word "clever" or the strange pop culture references they make, they keep you engaged in the game. During the third quarter, with the Cats up 83-25, backup ruckman Trent West was guilty of a trip when he spread his legs a bit wider than normal causing a Bombers player to tumble. Cometti said that it was obviously a trip, unless West was "like the congressman from Minnesota, and has a wide stance."

Footy is all around fun to watch, but with a team like the Cats and announcers like Bruce and Dennis it's a party all the way to 2 AM.

Greazy All Alone in First, For Now.

Man am I a genius or what? I went 3-1 in last nights games and got all three games right that I had a horse in. Who could have seen Xavier v WVU coming? That puts me at 36-16 which is nearly a 70% clip. I still have 128 possible points, but I am still down two final four teams and my national runner up in Pittsburgh. Inky went 2-2 yesterday putting her at 35-17 while XL was 1-3 thanks to the UCLA win to take him to 32-20.

XL still has 137 points on the table and could still win if: Davidson goes the final four, and Xavier topples UCLA. For me to win, I basically need Kansas to not come out of the midwest (which would mean a Wisconsin or Davidson final four trip) and for Stanford to take out Texas before bowing out to Memphis. Got that?

Our coin flip bracket is pretty much doing about as well as one might expect. George Washington went 0-4 yesterday and is at 23-29 for the tourney. On the bright side, he is the only one of us who has an NCAA school named after him, so...

NFL To Players: Get A Hair Cut or Get A Real Job

As has been widely reported this week the NFL competition committee wants to pass a rule to regulate how long a players hair can be. There are guys in the league like Troy Palamalu and Rasheed Mathis and Ricky Williams lest we forget that choose to wear their hair long enough that it covers the name on the back of their jersey. The NFL now has a problem with this because if the hair is obstructing the name of the player we somehow will not know who they are. I meant he league is militant with some of their rules. Towels have to all be the same length, you can only wear certain kinds of shoes plus you have to keep your shirt tucked in at all times. It's like NFL players attend West Point or something. I mean most of these guys can't even manage their lives yet they're expected to follow these rules. I guess the league gets a kick out of telling a bunch of 20 something millionaires how they have to look one day a week. Needless to say the Players Association has a right to veto such a rule and I'm sure they will. I just wish the NFL would find better ways to improve the game other than proposing the Super Bowl be held in a foreign country or worry about the length of a players hair.

All Hail Queen Inky

After the first 48 games of the NCAA Tourney we all have something to hang our hat on. I'm tied for first place with a 33-15 mark. XL has an outside shot to win, and George Washington was the first President of the nation. Inky has it all over all of us, however, with the same 33-15 mark that I have, but she can max out at 168 points for the whole bracket. The best I can do is 128 since I've lost two final four teams and one title game team.

XL can still win it if UCLA and Kansas both lose their next game, and if Davidson takes Wisconsin out, but that is a big if. Nothing is set in stone in March Madness, but it looks as if Inky will be the champ.

Inky Starts to Pull Away

Don't let the standings fool you, Inky is in the drivers seat in the Bracket Challenge. While she and I both went 6-2 in yesterday's games, leaving us tied at 28-12 overall (and with 34 points), I lost one of my finals teams in Pitt. That'll teach me to pick a hunch again. XL finished the day at 5-3, putting him at 26-14 (31 pts) thus far but he still has more possible points ,156, then I do with 142. Again, Inky is in the drivers seat with 170 possible points, leaving me a situation where I need Georgtown to make it to the final 4 and Memphis to lose to UNC in the title game to win the whole thing.

Oh well, I guess I'll be relegated to 3rd in a four horse race. George Washington sits at 22-18 with 25 points. However, he has lost most of the rest of his bracket including both finals teams meaning the best he can do is 59 points. Thank god for the toss o' the coin, or I may have come in last.

It's a Tight Race

Anyone who spends a lot of time with Inky, XL and I will tell you that we have a bit of a shorthand together. Call it the result of way too much time spent together in twos and threes over the past decade and a half, but we are all on the same brain frequency. (The proof may lie in the fact that they will both make the same joke about the previous sentence.) Another place that it may manifest itself is our brackets.

On the second day of the Tourney I posted a record of 10-6, losing two Sweet 16 teams in Vandy and Drake among those 6 losses. Inky also lost those same two Sweet 16 team in a day that saw her go 9-7, and resulting in a tie between the two of us for the top spot at 22-10. For his part, XL had a 10-6 day but lost an Elite 8 team in UConn to go along with the other Sweet 16 team he lost in Clemson. Coupled with his day one totals, XL is now one game back at 21-11 in a three horse race.

Our bracket determined by a toss o' the coin is really taking it on the chin. After starting off 12-4 on day one, George Washington posted a 7-9 on day two for a total at this point of 19-13. However, GW has lost 8 sweet 16 teams, 4 Elite 8 teams and Gonzaga in both the final four an title game. Sure, he could found a nation, but can he do better than 50/50 on the bracket? No.

Today may be the telling day for this race, since Inky, XL and I all have UNC winning we will all live or die in the next two rounds. May the best blogger win, and if it can't be me, I guess I'm pulling for XL because Inky would never let me hear the end of it if she won.

This Just In: UConn Falls to Whale's Vagina

Wasn't it just the other day that some big fat dego was spouting off about how San Diego didn't deserve to go to the tourney, because they weren't even the second best team in the WCC? I think it went something like this:

"With San Diego bouncing both St. Marys and Gonzaga (who have both been top 25 teams this year and were shoe ins to get into the bracket) there is one less spot in the field of 65. Does San Diego deserve to go to the tourney? Probably not since St. Marys and Gonzaga were the pimps of the WCC this year... The question is: is this a good thing or a bad thing? Is a 1 in 1000 chance that San Diego might knock off Duke or Georgetown in a #2 v #15 game worth not seeing a Big 10 team who was in the middle of the pack make it, and maybe catch lightning in a bottle..."

Wow, looks like I blow. Whale's Vagina may have been the third best WCC team, but they are also the last one standing with Gonzaga and St. Mary's both falling today. The Toreros played a gutty game even after losing their two best players to fouls in the OT, eventually winning on an amazing 17 footer by De'Jon Jackson who was a pedestrian 1-9 for 2 points up to that point. In the end the only part of the box score that matters is 1-1 for 2 points, as that was the shot that sunk UConn. Call it pay back for the New England Patriots beating Whales Vagina in the NFL or call it a bunch of kids who didn't know that they were really supposed to lose, but one thing is clear: I was wrong about Whales Vagina not deserving their bid. My bad, but a great game to watch. I can't wait till the 12v13 showdown on Sunday.

Inky out to an early lead

In the marathon that is the Inky and the Sports Guys NCAA Bracket Challenge '08, Inky is out to an early lead over the sports guys, and George Washington. After the first 16 games were played, Inky's record stands at 13-3. She went with BYU, Baylor and Marquette in the South and West but was perfect in the East and Midwest. And believe you me, she let me hear about it last night.

But, this is a marathon and not a sprint, and so I am happy to say that I am in second place with a 12-4 record. I went the wrong way by taking Kent St, Kentucky, Baylor and I hoped that lightning could strike twice by taking George Mason as my only 5v12 upset. XL isn't too far behind as he sports an 11-5 record after the first day, having been let down by George Mason, Kent, USC, Kentucky and Georgia. Like Inky and I, XL has not lost a team past this round, so the contest remains hotly contested.

Our first president (in quarter form) is not so lucky however. Despite posting a 12-4 record on the first day, GW has already lost 4 future games since he had Winthrop going to the Elite 8 and USC and Baylor in the sweet 16. His whole damn bracket nearly came down as he has Duke winning it all, and for those that didn't watch, Belmont gave them all they could handle in a one point win.

That's why I love tourney time! Last second shots, Cinderella and picking brackets. More to come tomorrow.

The Cats Kick it Off

On a day which just might be one of the best of the year, I was up early to watch the Geelong Cats topple the Port Adelaide Power in the AFL Grand Final Rematch. While the Cats got out to a big early lead and lead by 31 at the half, the Power (who were the second best team in the competition last year) never quit and made it an interesting game down the stretch. Still, Geelong prevailed 15.15 (105) to 13.12 (96). {For those of you not down with the Footy, the first number is 6 point goals, the second is 1 point "behinds" and the third number is the total score}

I was pleased with much of what I saw from the Cats in the season opener, as they were playing with a few members of last year's title team missing. The Power had it all over the Cats in Ruck, as Geelong had to make due without either of their starting Ruckmen from last year's Grand Final. Port's Brendon Lade took advantage and had a big game in a losing effort. Despite the final margin only being 9, the cats could have easily won by 29, having had 4 kicks hit one of the center posts thus turning 6 pointers into 1 pointers. Cam Mooney in particular struggled with the post as he saw two of his own shots just barley scrape the goal on the way through.

In all, it was a great sign for Geelong as their past, present and future were all on display on the ground tonight. (read: this morning in the US). Young Tom Hawkins kicked a circus goal from an impossible angle and nearly had a high flying mark (pictured above) in the game. Not bad for a 19 year old, huh? Gary Ablett Jr. had another great all around game, and even shaved his head so he didn't look quite as ridiculous with his thinning hair.

My next footy fix will come this weekend as there are two games on Setanta, then I have to wait to see Geelong next Friday night. Until then, however, it's March Madness time, and Inky, XL, A Quarter and I are all doing battle. I'll update the stats tonight.

Hey Barry, Suck a Dick.

Someone needs to tell Barry Bonds and Don Fehr that if you keep crying collusion at the drop of a hat no one is going to believe you when you are actually being colluded against. In the wake of every major league team, Tampa included, turning their heads when Barry comes around, Fehr has said that the MLBPA is considering an investigation. What? So, basically Fehr (who coincidentally has done as much to destroy the integrity of baseball over the last decade as anyone else) is saying that because Barry can still hit the long ball, that every team should want him. And furthermore, if no team wants him, it's because the owners all got together and agreed not to sign him as punishment.

That is, of course, complete and utter crap. If lil' Boss wanted a slugger to bring the HR record back to Yankee Stadium, then Bonds would be in pinstripes no matter what the rest of the owners said. The fact is, Bonds is a fat, pimply faced nerd with a jewfro and no one wants to blow him.

Follow me on this one, i promise I'm going somewhere.

If Bonds is being colluded against because no one is signing him, that would be like that same fat kid saying that all the girls in his senior class are colluding against him because he never gets blown. I no one wants you, the very fact of them not wanting you en mas, doesn't prove that you are being wronged. It proves that no one wants to put your cock in their mouth.

Bean Town Boycott??

As is widely known the Red Sox and A's will be opening up the MLB season on the 25th of this month in Japan. It is no surprise that MLB is branching out with regular season games in a country that already has a similar love for the game. Why the boycott you say? Well it turns out that while the players will get $40,000 each in stipens to travel to Japan the coaches and supporting staff will get nothing. The millionaire players will receive more than a lot of people make in a year to spend three or four days in Japan while the under paid coaches and support staff (some of whom make only $30,000 a year) would be forced to fend for themselves.

How fucked up is this? Major League baseball a multi billion dollar business can't pony up some money to make sure the coaches and support staff of two of their teams can eat or enjoy themselves representing them in a foreign country. The Dodgers and Padres went to China this past week to play an exhibition game in front of 12,500 people, each player received $3000 while again the coaches and support staff were stiffed. For whatever reason the Padres and Dodgers didn't complain about this. They accepted it as part of their duty as amabadors of the game and didn't complain.

The Red Sox however refused to take the field in their final exhibition game today until this was resolved as well as refusing to go to Japan if the coaches were not properly compensated. The A's had no idea about the discrepancy but once informed they of course joined the Red Sox players in the boycott. Major League baseball came through in the end to resolve this potential disaster but it's still amazing to me that it had to come to this.

First of all don't these coaches have representation when MLB and the Players Association negotiate these kind of trips. Who speaks up for them? It's a good thing the Red Sox players pay attention to details and I would say I support their boycott to an extent. However, if each of them is getting $40,000 for the trip you'd think if nothing else each player could throw some money in the pot to help take care of their coaches. I mean who the hell spends 40 G's on "expenses" plus aren't these guys already overpaid without having to get perks like expense checks. Next thing you know they'll be requesting reimbursement for mileage because they can't afford to keep gas in their Hummers and BMW's on the way into the ball park.

Where Are They Now: 1991 Duke Male Cheerleader MVP Jamal Latrell

I had to dig deep to find this next candidate for "where are they now" you could say it took me two weeks to find him. I'm sure you are all familiar with the dynasty that was Duke basketball in the early 90's. Back to back championships, heroes like Christian Laettner, Bobby Hurley, and Grant Hill dominating on the court. A little known fact is that after the NCAA tourney each year there is an award given for the cheerleader (both male and female) that exhibits the most "cheer" throughout the tournament. In the year 1991 this distinction fell to Jamal Latrell of the Duke Blue Devils Cheer Squad. Below is the transcript of our conversation.

XL: So Jamal, you're not an easy guy to find. What was it like to be on the court with the likes of the 91 Blue Devils?

JL: Well XL, I've really gotta tell you that they should have been in awe of sharing the floor with me. I mean I cheered my ass off for those guys and hoisted those little tarts in the air for all the men folk to gawk at. But I was really the star, no other cheer leader could bend and twist the way I did. I know on several occasions the players said it was my cheering that inspired them to come from behind (and I do like it from behind) in those close games with Kentucky and UConn.

XL: Wow Jamal, you really seem proud of your past. How did you come to be a male cheerleader in the first place?

JL: I never really fit in with the normal crowd I was limp wristed and never good at sports. The boys always picked on me because of this so I spent a lot of time with the girls. I could double dutch like nobodies business and decided to take up gymnastics at a young age. By the time I was 12 I could do no handed back flips through the house plus fit myself in all kinds of tight spots. My older brother Lamar was real supportive of me when I decided to be the first male cheer leader in my high school. He had similar challenges athletically although where he went to school he got in with a boy genius who helped him patent a special javelin that accounted for his limp wristed style. But that's another story...

XL: How did it go being the first male cheer leader at your high school, I bet you faced a lot of adversity.

JL: I did at first, it was hard for people to understand why a guy would want to be a male cheerleader. Some thought I was in it to touch the girls but most knew that I was a gymnast who wanted to show my stuff. I took a lot of crap but in the end it was worth it because I landed at Duke.

XL: What was it like to be so close to teams as great as the ones Duke fielded in the early 90's?

JL: It was amazing, the fans are rabid and they loved to see me flip. I know the game was going on but I had a lot of people talking about me after the game. Plus that Christian Laettner was so gorgeous I mean one look at him and my heart would palpitate. He and I had a thing at the end of his senior year although I know he would never admit it. I helped give him the incentive he needed to hit all those last minute shots. The reason he was such an NBA flop was because he ran out on me and denied our torrid love affair. I was hurt but there's more than enough of Jamal to go around.

XL: After Duke what did you do?

JL: I did a little cheering for the Charlotte Hornets. I always had a thing for Alonzo Mourning and Charlotte was eager to get a MVP cheerleader from one of the best schools in the country. Zo rejected me though and I spent some time on the street. I would entertain passers by doing flips or other acrobatics. On some instances a lonely stranger might pay me to take my dick out and touch my toes or other types of things. Not some of my proudest days. Fortunately Lamar, found me and gave me a job with his company. He was now a millionaire with his partner and they wanted me to help develop a new line of enhanced athletics to help the limp wristed.

XL: It's good to have a big brother to bail you out of trouble although it sounds like you went through a tough spell. It was nice to catch up with you Jamal, I'll be sure to pass along your regards to Christian Laettner if anyone ever sees him again.

George Washington is a Duke Apologist

It's not just Dickie V, our first president is also a Duke homer, as it turns out. With Inky, XL and I all filling out our brackets today, I felt it necessary to have a "control bracket" which I determined by flipping a quarter for each game. I put the #1 seeds into the second round without a toss o' the coin, because there is no chance one will lose, but for each game after that I flipped with heads going for the higher seed and tails the lower.

George Washington says Austin Peay will take down Texas, St. Mary's will make the Elite 8 and that Duke will win the whole thing. What can I say, he was from ACC country, and I guess since Virgina wasn't in it, he had to back Duke. GW's final 4 are: Duke, Michigan St. Tennessee and Gonzaga. He has UNC falling to Arkansas in the second round, which cleared a path for Winthrop to drop WSU, Notre Dame and Arkansas on the way to the Elite 8.

In the Midwest, Kansas survives all the way to the Elite 8, but they fall to the Zags who took out Davidson, Georgetown and USC to get there. Siena made the sweet 16 by beating Vandy and Clemson in a scenario that could actually come to pass.

Down in the dirty dirty south, Tom Izzo's Spartans batter Pennsylvania by topping Temple and Pitt before ousting Oregon and St. Mary's to earn their spot in the final 4. St. Mary's didn't have to worry about Texas after Austin Peay added themselves to the list of 2v15 upsets.

Out west, Duke's path to the title went through Belmont, Arizona, Baylor, UConn and MSU. UCLA made it as far as the Sweet 16 but they were stopped by UConn. Baylor made the most of their at large bid by winning over Purdue and Xavier and no teammates were killed.

In the end, I think our founding father has just as good a shot of winning the whole thing as either Inky, XL or I. Which is more than bit sad.

Let's Play Two!

The last post I did about College Basketball was about the notion of a team getting to go to the big dance because they won their conference tournament. I brought up the point that the automatic bid should go to the team that won the regular season, because it shouldn't reward a team that just gets hot over a few days, but sucked all regular season long. I take it back.

I'm really enjoying the run that the Georgia Bulldogs are on right now. A run that is made all the more special by the fact that they had to pull and Ernie Banks and play two yesterday. Now, a team winning two big time college basketball games in one day is impressive to start, but when you consider that UGA was 14-16 when the day began and that the teams they played were 40-20 and only played one game each, you see just how big it was for the Dawgs.

The stars kept on aligning when Arkansas toppled heavy favorites Tennessee in the other semi meaning that if UGA has anything left in the tank they could complete an amazing run today at 3:30. Chances are pretty good that the Razorbacks will win that game, but the boys from Georgia are playing not only for a chance to go to the NCAA's but also for a state ripped apart by a huge storm system. So, don't count the Dawgs out. I'll be pulling for them.

Good Try Billy, Maybe Stick to Comedy Though...

As had been widely reported this week Billy Crystal started for the New York Yankees in an exhibition game against the Pittsburgh Pirates. Crystal batted first and DH'd in place of Johnny Damon who was the scheduled DH for the day. In Crystal's first and only at bat he struck out swinging after being ahead 3-1 in the count. Crystal did manage to make contact and foul off the first strike down the first base line. He also evidently had a good eye to let three balls go by before swinging over the next two pitches.

Crystal wore number 60 in honor of his upcoming 60th birthday in a few days. Some critics have said the Yankees were "making a mockery" of the game by allowing Crystal to suit up. While I rarely support anything the Yankees do I happen to not have a problem with this. I mean if anyone is "making a mockery" out of the game it's the guys like Clemens and Bonds that cheated or teams like Baltimore and Tampa who seem unable to compete. It's not like Billy Crystal is the first celebrity to do this either. Tom Selleck and Garth Brooks (and you might as well include Michael Jordan) are others that have participated in Spring Training with big league teams. It's not like the Yanks let Crystal lead off game 1 of the ALCS or anything, now that would be stupid. Soto these critics I deem you my stiff of the week. Happy Birthday Billy, maybe next time Robin Williams can catch for you if you know what I mean....we all know that when you hit 60 you get a pizza.

I Must Say It'll Be a Good Day...

I'm pretty stoked about next Thursday, more so than usual. You see, I think the first day of the NCAA Tournament should be a "Guy's Holiday" and that all men should get to stay home and watch hoops all day long. This year I get to add another of my favorite things to the NCAA hoops, the excitement of the bracket and the hope of a buzzer beater. This year, before the first tip of the first game, I will already be done watching a full live sporting event.

It seems like just yesterday that I watched the AFL Grand Final with XL, but it's footy season again bitches. So on Thursday the 20th my Geelong Cats will be taking the pitch at AAMI stadium in Adelaide Australia for a rematch with the Port Adelaide Crows, who they destroyed in the the title game last September. Since the only way to watch the Footy in the US is through Setanta, and the only way to get Setanta is through dish, I decided to go ahead and get the dish. So that means I no longer have to sit at my computer in the middle of the night listening to the Cat's games on Triple M radio out of Melbourne. It also means that I can use the DVR to record the games that start at 5 AM here, and watch them as soon as I get up, being able to fast forward through the commercials.

All this will make it easier for me to follow my Cats as they try to win back to back Premierships. It also means I'll be able to follow my SuperCoach team's progress through out the season. That is basically the same thing as fantasy football here, and I'm in a league for the first time. I can't wait for the opening bounce!

Regular season or Tournament?

A few weeks back the basketball coach at my alma mater was being interviewed about the importance of winning the team's third regular season title in 4 years. He made the point that the regular season title is more important to him than the conference tournament, because it is a measure of who is better over 16 games, not 3. He also probably feels that way because after winning that regular season title we lost in the first round of the tournament and didn't have a strong enough campaign to make it into the NCAAs as an at large bid.

This debate is going on in DI too. With San Diego bouncing both St. Marys and Gonzaga (who have both been top 25 teams this year and were shoe ins to get into the bracket) there is one less spot in the field of 65. Does San Diego deserve to go to the tourney? Probably not since St. Marys and Gonzaga were the pimps of the WCC this year, but alas, there will be a ho at the dance too. There will be other top teams who don't win their conference tournament which will cause more "Big 6" conference schools to be relegated to the NIT, Maryland, I'm looking at you.

The question is: is this a good thing or a bad thing? Is a 1 in 1000 chance that San Diego might knock off Duke or Georgetown in a #2 v #15 game worth not seeing a Big 10 team who was in the middle of the pack make it, and maybe catch lightning in a bottle and go to the sweet 16. We all love the Cinderella story (tears in his eyes I guess) but we all hate 110 to 54 games in the first round too.

It's important to note that the Cinderella is almost never one of these upstart teams that only made it in at 14-15 due to winning their conference tournament, they are almost always the Valpo's and late 90's Gonzaga teams that are in reality very good teams but just don't get a lot of play. St. Mary's could very well be that team in DI this year. The DIII version, St. Mary's of Maryland, who are in the Sweet 16 at the expense of my Spartans are the exception, not the rule.

UNC Takes it to Duke

Wow! What a game that was. If you weren't watching #1 North Carolina went into Cameron Indoor Stadium and knocked off #5 Duke by a final of 76-68. UNC used a 10-0 run to close out the game to win the ACC and almost certainly the #1 seed in the East bracket of the NCAA Tournament. Duke trailed for nearly the whole game, but had a spurt midway through the second half to take their first lead. But, in the stretch following their first lead since 3-0, the Devils couldn't seem to hit anything, and they had no answer for Tyler Hansbrough who had 16 points 15 rebounds and 2 of UNC's 15 blocked shots.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's hard to win with out a big man. Just ask my alma mater, the only way you can win without a true post player is to shoot the lights out, one cold night from the floor and you're toast. In tonight's game Duke shot 33% from the field including 10-29 from distance.

All in all it was a really great game to watch, with momentum swinging back and forth through out. About the only thing that could have made this game better is if Erin Andrews had worn a sheer white tank top and a pair of girls medium booty shorts on the side line. I wouldn't be surprised to see these two team play each other again twice, once in the ACC tourney and once in the final four. I just wish the NCAA would get their head out of their ass and make Duke the #2 in the east so they could meet in the elite 8 in a game played in North Carolina.

Fuck Comcast.net Sports

I was on may daily stroll through the Internet today and I came across a headline on Comcast.net that stopped me in my tracks for a second. It says "'Skins Re-sign Star Player" (as you can see on the left) which of course interested me. I am a Skins fan, and I was unaware that any of our star players needed resigning, so I clicked on it and found this story, with this headline: "KR Cartwright agrees to $3 Million, 3-Year deal with Redskins." Would you call a 1 million dollar a year deal with a second string full back who also returns kicks headline worthy? No, which is why the dickhole editor at Comcast.net Sports decided to punch it up and draw Skins fans in with this chicanery. Well fuck them, they are my stiff of the week for last week AND next week.

I mean no disrespect to Rock, who I love, but to call him a star player is like calling Sargent Slaughter a recording artist. Sure Rock is important to the team, but he's a second string full back, a third string half back and our starting kick returner. Not exactly "star player" material. Sure a kick returner is important, but I think about it like Dennis miller once said (before he became a right wing nut): It's like being second tuba in the Boston Pops, sure you'll always have work, but it's not getting you laid.

And Then There Were Four

It is being reported in the Baltimore Sun today that the center piece of the Miguel Tejada deal, Troy Patton, will miss the entire 2008 season with a torn labrum in his shoulder. There were five players traded for Tejada, (the best player the O's had for the last 3 seasons) two of which were supposed to be Major League ready. Luke Scott, the gun toting left fielder was expected to improve an aging outfield and Patton was supposed to compete for a spot in the rotation. At 22 he had already proven himself in the Astros organization and seemed to be heading toward a bright future. He's young and he's a lefty which all but assured him a good contract and steady career. Now the O's get to pay him to sit on the bench and rehab all year and hope that he can come back to form for 2009.

Andy McPhail, the architect of this trade is quoted as not being concerned with this injury. After all, the guy is young and the O's are going to compete with Tampa for the cellar this year anyway. McPhail, also says he knew about a possible shoulder injury when the trade was made but felt like it was worth the gamble. I have a lot of respect for Andy McPhail, he's accomplished a lot helping other teams rebuild but I wonder if he knows the history of the Orioles and making trades.

I know I obsessively refer to the infamous Glen Davis trade that sent Curt Schilling and Steve Finley among others to the Astros for a has been first basemen. We also traded John Maene for a guy who only played half a season and then got hurt and couldn't play the next year either (Kris Benson). Now Maine is a star for the Mets and we have nothing to show for it other than wasted money. I could go on for days on this but I'll digress, it's just frustrating to see another deal for a quality player appear to go south. Maybe McPhail will be right, Patton will have his surgery come back strong next year and be a key contributor for the O's for the next 5 or 6 years assuming we are smart enough to lock him up to a long term deal. Another sore subject being as the O's have to be one of the worst teams in history at retaining free agents.

So as I await the start of what will likely be a 62-100 season I won't miss having Tejada and all the steroid/perjury talk in the paper every day but I will wonder if we got the right players in a deal that should have made this team better for the future.

Meet Me at the MCG

I've been to a lot of sporting events in my life, but never this far away from home. At the same time that an Aussie Cricketer was tackling a naked guy yesterday, I was booking tickets to see the Geelong Cats battle the one team that gave them a run for their money last year, the Collingwood Magpies, at the Melbourne Cricket Ground. So Inky and I will be among the 100,000 footy mad fans who pack the MCG on May 23 to see if Geelong is still the team to beet or if the Pies have caught up to them.

The MCG is considered one of the finest sporting venues in the world, and short of seeing an Ashes test there, seeing these two teams square off will be about the best I could ever hope for. We will be on the second level in the Olympic Stands in section N3 which is right between the two center goal posts. I can't wait to see the game, and I should have a ton of great pictures. I've gone to a lot of sporting events for this blog, from Cal's Induction and minor league baseball to AHL Hockey and Ho League Basketball, but all of those trips together and then multiplied by 10 don't add up to the amount of miles I'll travel to cover this game for I&TSG.

Where Are They Now: Danny Noonan Bushwood Country Club Caddy Champion

We've all seen the 80's classic Caddyshack and know that in the end Danny Noonan not only beat Denunzio for the Caddy championship but he also helped Ty and Al Czervik win a match play game against Judge Smails and Dr. Beeper. It was a great summer for Noonan as he was able to not only win the Caddy scholarship he also got some cool cash from Ty & Czervik for bailing them out of a close match. After the credits rolled we never heard from Noonan again and upon special request from Greazy and Inky I have tracked down Danny Noonan to find out "Where are you now".

XL: So Danny, when we last saw you, you had just helped Czervik and Ty win a match against Smails and Beeper. You had a scholarship in hand and a non pregnant Irish girl on your arm. Where did life take you?

DN: XL, I was ready to move out of my parents house with the 8 other kids running around. College was all I could think about, the lumber yard was out of the picture. Once I found out Maggie wasn't pregnant I kicked her to the curb. I was ready to go out and create my own Animal House. I even had an invite to try out for the college Golf Team. Things were looking good.

XL: Sounds like you were off to a pretty good start. How was college life?

DN: I loved it from the minute I set foot on campus. I went to Adams College so I had to steer clear of the Alpha Betas but that wasn't hard with those silly Tri-Lambs always instigating them. I tried out for the golf team and decided to major in Agricultural Science with a focus on Greens Keeping so I could stay close to the course no matter what. I made the team and played pretty well. I never won any championships in college but I had a good time playing and made a lot of friends. The major was tough though, I mean with all the hot ladies in the Daisy Dukes walking around it was hard to concentrate. I eventually decided to drop out.

XL: So you didn't finish your degree to become a greens keeper but you had fun. So where did you go after college?

DN: Well Bushwood had an opening for Assistant Greens Keeper because Karl got promoted. He and I always had a good relationship so he brought me on to assist with keeping the course up to date. Karl was promoted because he finally got that pesky gopher that was wreaking havoc on the greens. I was given his shack to stay in which was nice. It was pond front which is always good and not far from the caddy shack so I was able to keep up with the goings on there. Denunzio was in charge over there now and we had gotten over our feud from when we were teens. We actually got together and regularly played pranks on the caddys as well as Smails when his old ass was on the course.

XL: What about Ty, did you stay in touch with him at all?

DN: Oh yeah, occasionally we would play a round together, he still played really early in the morning. He developed an affinity for Chicago sports clothing and always had some kind of jersey or tee shirt on from that area. His game got worse as he got older, I have finally beat him in a round although he would never admit it. He offered me a job in one of his corporations but I was content at Bushwood, my home away from home.

XL: So as Assistant Greens Keeper, do you get lots of chicks?

DN: Well all the old ladies love me, they seem to think I'd be interested in them, not sure what Karl used to do as Asst Green Keeper with the older ladies but I'm not interested. I'm actually back with Maggie, we've been married for 5 years and have three kids. We all live in the shack on the course. The kids love the pond and Maggie can get us all the gourmet food we want from the restaurant so it's not a bad life.

XL: It was good talking to you Danny, good to hear that you are enjoying life as Karl's underling. Also good to hear that you and Denunzio have made up and are friends.

DN: One final note on that, Denunzuio may be a greazy wop dego but he runs a tight ship and he keeps the prices of coke down so all the caddys love him. His wife also makes a mean lasagna!!

Brett, My Sweet Brett

Barring any last minute change of heart, Brett Favre will officially retire from the NFL. Some will say that it is about time the old man gets out of the way and let's someone else take the helm in Green Bay. But, I, for one, will miss Brett. As some of you already know, Brett was my auto-drafted quarterback in my fantasy league last year. And, when all hope was lost and LT was being a real bitch, Brett came through for me. Some weeks, Brett was all I had. With his resurgence, I went from 11th place, to a play off team. Without him around, I don't know what I will do next year. I was seriously considering drafting him again.

So, enjoy your richly deserved retirement, Brett. I will miss you. But, look on the bright side, you'll have more time for fun things, like hunting or fishing or spending time in saunas.

.

*Some stats on my boy Brett: 442 TD passes, 253 Consecutive starts, 160 Wins, 5377 completed passes, 61,655 passing yards. I mean, DAMN!!

This Week In Unfortunate Names

Inky was flipping around the channels today and all of the sudden she demanded that I come see what she had found. There, paused on our screen thanks to the magic of Tivo, was a high school cheerleader named: Morgan Beavers. Ouch. We didn't watch to see if she and her squad won, but sufficed to say she is already the winner of a number of nicknames in her school. Maybe she'll change her name to Morgan Arcadia.

Moving on in our tour of unfortunate names in sports this week we have Randall Gay, who just got 17.8 Million bucks from his hometown team: the Saints. The headline in the New Orleans Times Picayune read "Saints Agree With Gay." I'm glad to see they are so forward thinking.

The last stop takes us to sunny Florida and to the man behind this headline: "Seminoles Fagg Has Successful Surgery on Knee." That would be FSU senior wide receiver, De'Cody Fagg. I'll leave all the tight end/receiver jokes in your hands, but I will say this: How great would it be if the Falcons drafted Fagg, so we could get to hear these calls twice a year:

"Fagg tried to get deep, but Gay shut him down"

"Gay really put it on Fagg when he tried to come over the middle"

"Fagg tried to push inside, but Gay stopped him"

"Gay just dropped to his knees and sucked Fagg's penis"

You know, something plausible and classy.

Drugs Are Bad, Gambling is Worse

I'm getting pretty sick and tired of the very few Bonds, McGwire and Clemens supporters out there who say that they all deserve to be in the Hall of Fame. The arguments run from "he never actually tested positive" to "Everyone was doing it, so no one should be kept out of the hall" both of which are stupid.

If Pete Rose and Shoeless Joe Jackson are left on the doorstep in Cooperstown, then so to should these three be. In so much as everyone worries that Rose and Jackson's gambling could have led to them altering the outcome of games, even championships, they are deemed to be eternally guilty. Moreover, they are accused of eroding the very credibility of the game, calling it's legitimacy into question and making little boys say "say it isn't so..." Bullshit.

They should both be in the hall, the other three yutzes should be forced to wait for induction, at the very least, until after they are dead. Then the honor isn't for them, it's about them. There are records in the game of baseball that have become sullied due to the actions of these men, and many others like them, and for that they must pay. Sure, there were a lot of other players on roid, but the blame in this situation is kind of like being a Quarterback. When you win it's because of you, even if it really wasn't, and when you lose it's because of you, even if it really wasn't. When these guys were getting stroked for being great they didn't stop to say "yeah but there are other guys who are also great." So, now they don't get to say "everyone else was doing it too."

Hey Roger, Mark and Barry: I hope it was worth it. Because no matter how many millions of dollars your drug use garnered you, that money can never buy the respect of baseball fans.