The Steelers have a mascot. Usually, they don't do this kind of thing, but for some reason they thought it wise to have one now. So, they recently unveiled Steely McBeam.
My problem with this exists on many levels. The first, and most obvious one being that his name is Steely McBeam. This is Pittsburgh. His name, without question, should be Steely Beamanowski. Seriously. Am I the only one familiar with the demographic in that town?
Second, this is a sports franchise with an item that identifies it. The Terrible Towel. So, why not make Terrible Towelie? Slap some arms and legs on a giant yellow towel, and you're ready to get high (If you don't get this reference, I can't help you). I should really be a sports marketing exec, because you know they would sell a shitload of figurines and stuffed "Terrible Towelies." Who wants Steely merch? No one, that's who.
Lastly, and no, I don't mean to disparage Steely. But, the overalls, the stubble, the construction-worker-esque outfit. Face it, Pittsburgh, he's gay. Hopefully he has the Dallas Cowboy and Chief Wahoo on speed-dial so they can meet the Cop and the Leatherman at the Anvil to get their groove on. YMCA!!
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